Last night as we drove home from the city, I looked out over the beautiful plains that were around me. There is no freeway with people driving faster than they should be. There is no distractions, no hurry, and no billboards to keep bombarding my brain. It was just me, my thoughts, and the road. Peaceful and quiet. And I wondered how many people were getting to experience this moment. How many people around the world for a moment in their day got the chance to not feel overwhelmed or pressured. Got the chance to slow down. I felt lucky. Extremely lucky.
Do you ever catch yourself in a hurry and your head screams at you, "slow down." The moment you sit for five seconds and all the weight of the day just fades. You can finally get your mind to stop running, your body relaxes and you breathe. I am sure like most of you, these moments rare. But when you find them, they renew you.
It always amazes me how we as humans live. We live in such a way that we move so fast going from here to there, up and down, and back around. How do we ever enjoy anything! From work, to mom and dad duties, after school activities, dinner, laundry, shopping, bills, exercise, hobbies, TV, social media, religion, politics, homework, appointments, friends, family...and so on and so on and so on! Do you ever wish you had a pause button?!?!?
I know I do.
When I was a single mom, I went from sun up to sun down and most nights not sleeping. I worked two jobs plus was a photographer with photoshoots and editing adding many long hours to my day. All the while still tying to raise two kids, find time to date, and heaven for bid...find time for myself. Many times I broke down in tears wondering how can I run faster than I am physically and mentally able? I wore myself thin. I couldn't do it all. I was getting by at best. Everything most days suffered. I tried to be to many things I wasn't. And I finally crashed. And I crashed hard. I needed a change.
One night while out running, I had that big moment of clarity. Running gave me that 30-45 minutes of pure me time. I could run out all my problems on the cement. As I started my run each time, I would say to myself, "here we are, just you and me...let's go." And I would run it out. Whether I was sad, angry, happy, or trying to make a decision the pavement always helped me work it out. It cleared my head and soul. That night, it was just before dusk. A beautiful color of coral lit the sky. The cars headlights were on and they created a soft glow. The air was crisp, and the wind touched my face. My music was on and I was in the zone. I could feel the pavement move beneath my feet. That night I was running to find strength to keep going. Searching for an answer of how to keep juggling my career, my life, and being a better mother. I was half way through my run and a song came on that pierced me. As soon as the melody started to play, the tears instantly came. I cried as I listened to the lyrics, I ran harder and harder. And the harder I ran, the stronger I felt. As the song was ending I stopped. Dead stopped. Heart was beating fast. My breath was long and hard. My head was clear. And I stood there crying watching as the cars flew by me, but as if they were moving slow. Circling around me. Lights dancing in the street.
I had my answer, and it was simple...
Slow down.
Breathe.
Slow down.
I share this because I find that we run, run faster and harder than we can physically and mentally go at times. We get so caught up in what others are doing, how they are doing it, and our own personal goals of perfection. We slowly wear ourselves thin, and we start doubting what we can do. Right now you are on your own journey. Not only to better your health, but to better your whole self. Realization, to what is causing your own personal failures, set backs, and desires to give up at times...is part of this process. As loud as it hit me that night on my run, find away for it to hit you. Put in perspective the things that are important...and just slow down.
Start by making a list of things that can be eliminated, then giving your priorities a realistic order of importance. I have slowly gone from running a hundred miles an hour, feeling like I had to commit to every single obligation. To now, only allowing those things that truly better my life to enter. Learn that saying the word "no" is okay. Stop allowing the chaos to come in. Take ahold of your own life. You are in control...stop allowing others to run it. And that includes social media. Learn what triggers your moods. And have a small game plan everyday. Last, get up and make your bed.every.single.morning. That small act, can put your entire day on the right track.
One thing I know is this...the moment you get overwhelmed and start giving up. Is the moment the whole thing falls apart. You can't build a city over night and you can't build a new life tomorrow. Everybody has to start somewhere. And the simplest start, that you continue to carry through with...will build to the next and then the next, and before long you are accomplishing things you thought would never come.
If you take away anything from what you have read, I hope you take this...allowing ourselves to be overwhelmed in our own progression only leads to self pressure. Self pressure leads to doubt and doubt leads to not doing at all. Give yourself more. Stop and breathe once in awhile. Be ok with not being able to do it all. And when things get hard, instead of looking at what others are doing better, find your strength, your own pavement to work it out on. Surround yourself with things that give you inspiration, not tear you down. Take one step at a time, building your own personal success story. Because it's in the things that you do for yourself that will help inspire others.
Here's to another great week...slow down, breathe, and stomp your own pavement out!
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